


I Pledge Allegiance to the Dorito

by plutosrose



Series: Proudly Serving [6]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Captain America Steve Rogers/Modern Bucky Barnes, M/M, Tiny Tiny Running Shorts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-01-25
Packaged: 2021-03-17 05:06:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28968771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/plutosrose/pseuds/plutosrose
Summary: Bucky is obsessed with Steve's tiny, tiny running shorts.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers
Series: Proudly Serving [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1999117
Comments: 26
Kudos: 189
Collections: Stucky Bingo 2020





	I Pledge Allegiance to the Dorito

**Author's Note:**

> Catch me on Tumblr at [plutosrose](https://plutosrose.tumblr.com/). I'm also officially on Twitter at [@plutosrose1](https://twitter.com/plutosrose1/)

Every morning, Steve went for a run like clockwork. And after his run, well...lately it seemed like Steve could barely get through the door after a run without Bucky groping the hell out of him.

Not that he minded, to be frank. There was something to be said for the heated glances that Bucky cast in his direction when he stepped through the door to Avengers Tower, as well as something to be said for the way that his eyes followed him as he walked past the coffee kiosk and over to the elevators.

This morning, though, Bucky had full on abandoned a line of people at the kiosk (unusual, Steve thought, but considering the fact that Bucky was now directly in front of him, the fact that there was a line at the kiosk ceased to be even a little bit interesting to him).

“Goddamn, Captain,” Bucky practically growled, running his hands up and down his sides, squeezing indecently at his ass through his shorts. “These things even legal?”

A shiver ran up Steve’s spine. “I...uh...they’re...SHIELD-issue I think? From when I was down in DC?” He was distinctly aware of the fact that Bucky was playing with the hem on the shorts. Fortunately, the crowd was almost gone, dispersing with a lot of grumbles about how they wished that Tony had set up a Starbucks in the Tower. 

“You’re asking an awful lot of questions, Captain,” Bucky grinned. “Are you sure that you got these in DC?”

Steve flushed hot, and nodded. “Yeah, I’m...I’m sure?” 

“Yeah?” Bucky raised an eyebrow at him, amusement in his eyes. Steve, for his part, had to focus very hard at listening to him, because he’d zeroed in on where Bucky’s hands were. “You don’t sound so sure to me.” 

Bucky’s fingers danced across his waistband. Steve sucked in a breath. “Goddamn, Stevie. You have a waistline like a fucking Rockette. This shit should be illegal.” Bucky’s hands roamed back down to his ass, before settling on his hips, just on the edge of pushing underneath his t-shirt. 

“Jesus, Buck. I’m all sweaty,” he said, moving to grab his hands, giving them a squeeze. Bucky shrugged.

“Not any worse than last weekend after Tony’s party.” The devilish grin on Bucky’s face made him turn even redder, because Steve really needed to be thinking about the fact that Bucky had asked him to pick him up and fuck him by one of the windows in his apartment that had a view of the goddamn Empire State Building in the fucking lobby, where anyone could get an eyeful of them. 

And that was only round one, he couldn’t think about rounds two through five without getting a semi, and that was just about the last thing that needed to happen in the goddamn lobby. 

“You want to hear what I want?”

Steve let out a breath. “Buck, you know I always want to hear that.” Bucky’s flirtatious and filthy remarks were a little thrill that never got old--especially since it had nothing to do with aliens or villainous mad scientists. Frankly, it hadn’t dawned on him that he’d been working nearly as much as he had before Bucky had started whispering filthy things in his ear and taking every opportunity he could to kiss him. It was honestly enough to make a man consider retiring permanently from superhero-ing. 

Bucky pulled him closer by digging his hands into his t-shirt. “I want to jerk you off by sticking my hands in your tiny, tiny short shorts.” 

“Jesus.”

“This ain’t a church and I ain’t God,” Bucky grinned, licking his lips, and maybe this wasn’t a church, but he knew that he would gladly, gladly get on his knees and worship Bucky Barnes every single night for the rest of his goddamn life. 

Bucky looped his fingers in the waistband of Steve’s shorts and started pulling him in the direction of the elevators. Bucky had pulled him toward the elevators so many times (including one extremely memorable time when he’d pulled him by the straps of his shield that he’d jerked off to many, many times) that Steve sometimes worried that he was going to develop some kind of Pavlovian boner to the elevators in the Tower. 

As Bucky led him past the kiosk, he noticed a man was there, and was giving them a pointed look. “Excuse me, can I get a cup of coffee?” 

“Fuck off,” Bucky said as he jabbed the button for the elevator. “I’m busy.” 

Steve turned bright red and tried to offer the man a sympathetic smile. The man didn’t seem too thrilled. 

“I’ll report this to Mr. Stark,” the man said tightly, glaring at both of them. 

“Cool,” Bucky shrugged as he pulled Steve after him. Steve went easily, because if there was somewhere that Bucky wanted him to go, fuck if he wouldn’t follow.  
-

Even after jerking Steve off through his tiny, tiny short shorts three times the day before (because Dr. Abraham Erksine was a goddamn national hero), Bucky’s appetite for Steve and his running shorts had not been fully satisfied. When Steve came back in from his run the following morning, Bucky could barely take his eyes off him. 

“He is shaped like a goddamn dorito, it’s fucking insane,” Bucky said when Steve walked past the coffee kiosk, smiling in his direction. “He’s a dorito. Captain Dorito. I pledge allegiance to the Dorito.” 

“Is that what you wanted to tell me?” Sam asked, blinking at Bucky. “I was in the middle of a briefing with Stark, and you texted me to say that it was an ‘emergency’ and all you wanted to do was comment on Steve’s shoulders-to-waist ratio?”

Bucky looked Sam in the eye. “Yes.”

“I seriously don’t know why I even fucking bothered, I must be insane,” Sam huffed as he stormed away from the kiosk.

“C’mon, don’t be like that Wamuel!” Bucky shouted after him. 

Sam flipped him off as he headed back toward the bank of elevators.

Bucky shook his head and unlocked his phone to text Steve.

_I’ll meet you upstairs in 10 minutes. Wear the shorts. xoxoxoxo_

**Author's Note:**

> I Pledge Allegiance to the Dorito  
> Creator(s): plutosrose  
> Card number: 012  
> Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28968771  
> Square filled: B3, Dorito  
> Rating: M  
> Archive warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply  
> Major tags: Captain America Steve Rogers/Modern Bucky Barnes, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafes, Tiny Tiny Running Shorts 
> 
> Summary: Bucky is obsessed with Steve's tiny, tiny running shorts.
> 
> Word count: 1,031


End file.
